The Himba, Namibia, & the Birth Song

This is really interesting!

theperfectbirth


Alicia recently shared a link with me about an African “birth song”. She thought I might enjoy it since I talked about having dreamt all my children. I really loved it and shared the link on my page. An excerpt from the story goes:

[T]here is a tribe in Africa where the birth date of a child is counted not from when they were born, nor from when they are conceived but from the day that the child was a thought in its mother’s mind. And when a woman decides that she will have a child, she goes off and sits under a tree, by herself, and she listens until she can hear the song of the child that wants to come. And after she’s heard the song of this child, she comes back to the man who will be the child’s father, and teaches it to him. And then…

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Are We Glorifying Self-Partnership

I came across the post on #18shadesofblack today on Sumitra Selvaraj’s @sareesandstories page on Instagram today. It is a campaign initiated by @sharmila006 , a Social Entrepreneur and a Fashion Artist to address as well as talk about restrictions being imposed on women, specifically in response to the social uproar when the Supreme Court of India lifted the ban on women of menstruating age from entering the Sabarimala temple.

Enabling women to live life their own way is perhaps the greatest restriction of all time.

A couple of days ago, I came across the term “self-partnering”, which is now trending after Emma Watson glorified her singlehood by coining the term “self-partnership” to her current relationship status. I’m not sure if the women’s liberation movement and feminism in general have been focusing on solving the root causes behind the need to have such movements in the first place.

Take the scenario of working women today, who fight for equal pay, longer maternity leaves and flexi work hours. All these demands go back to their ultimate concern: childcare. During the old days, the men used to be the breadwinners and the women played the role of homemakers. Then, as the living standard increased, women were expected to help share the financial load and this became a necessity for some women who were both victims of domestic violence and financially oppression.

We saw women joining the workforce to address the issues they were facing. Of all these “solutions”, we hardly see where and how men are involved as a part of the solution. We only see women largely adjusting their lifestyles to meet the demands of their family. And today, we paint a picture that relationships are fragile, not worthy, and that men are not dependable. Women are glorifying the status of being single because it is liberating, and it depicts how strong women can be.

If only women are allowed to just be who they are, all these unnecessary restrains wouldn’t have surfaced. If we stopped measuring the worth of women from their skin colour or how well they cook, we could have slowed down the aggravation behind radical feminism. And today, we are subconsciously nurturing financially independent “strong” women because that is the next yardstick that would measure the worth of women. This also indirectly tells that men are not to be dependent on, and if women shed tears or are weak, they are losing the game.

It is so sad to see that we are undervaluing relationships, portraying the wrong image of human and family values to the generations to come. If only we teach men how to rectify issues coming from them and if only women are not restricted and judged for who they are, cared and loved for by men, the second wave feminism and the power struggle in modern relationships could be a lot easier to handle with.

Learning to Trust Your Intuition

Love this post! Documenting feelings worked best for me

The Sisters of the Fey

Do you struggle with trusting your intuition? Do you feel pangs of anxiety when having to face a big decision in your life, fighting the inner conflict of the two sides of the coin when you know something is off, yet, you don’t know whether you should trust your inside warning system or if you should just simply wave off your concerns as your imagination?

All of us have been in these predicaments at various times in our lives. And I’m sure many of us tend to wave off our worries, sometimes allowing the chips to fall where they may because we’re just too afraid to make an executive decision. But often, letting the chips fall where they may because of self-doubt will lead to a negative outcome. So how can we help ourselves become more assertive when it comes to making a decision about things we don’t really want…

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Confessions of an Independent Woman

A great read

SoulSpeak with Sonam

~”Being a woman has never been easy, nor tougher than now” – Me~

“This is not a feminist rant that demands unreasonable equality, nor a condemnation of men. It is merely a reflection of  what it feels like to be a woman in today’s India.”

We belong to a remarkable generation – one where definitions are changing, stereotypes being broken, glass ceilings shattering, new gender roles emerging, and gender equality is finally being accepted – it’s a transitional time for women empowerment, but being a woman has never been tougher. And here’s why.

Times are a-changing

In the 1900s, women had a predefined role in society – they were expected to be homemakers, and providing food and comfort to their families were their primary goals in life. To be a good daughter, wife, and mother was what made them happy. In a twisted way, our mothers had it easier than us…

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